A poll for standard members about the IM change  

FresnoWoman 48F
235 posts
7/21/2019 12:51 pm
A poll for standard members about the IM change

So we know standards no longer get 3 free IMs a day to send, and now you have to spend points to send.

However do you spend/lose points if you receive IMs?

IF and only if you're a Standard member, please vote. There is one option for Golds who want to vote but really, this isn't your circus.
Female Standard Member - I lose points if I answer an IM
Female Standard Member - I don't lose points if I answer an IM
Male Standard member - I lose points if I answer an IM
Male Standard member - I don't lose points if I answer an IM
T/NB/Couple Standard member - I lose points if I answer an IM
T/NB/Couple Standard member - I don't lose points if I answer an IM
I'm a Gold member who just has to vote for some reason


FresnoWoman 48F
484 posts
7/21/2019 12:51 pm

Repeating the text in case words get deleted from the post:

So we know that standards no longer get 3 free IMs a day to send, and now you have to spend points to send.

However do you spend/lose points if you receive IMs?

IF and only if you're a Standard member, please vote. There is one option for Golds who want to vote but really, this isn't your circus.


jajo696 64F
637 posts
7/21/2019 12:56 pm

.......and a circus it indeed is ~~


Johnhorning2003 59M
2 posts
7/21/2019 1:00 pm

Its bullshit! Cant even chat with people..... Talk about controlling...smdh


GhostofH 60M
18005 posts
7/21/2019 1:02 pm

    Quoting Johnhorning2003:
    Its bullshit! Cant even chat with people..... Talk about controlling...smdh
It seems that IF you want to 'play'... you have to 'pay'....


1_Sweet_World 54M/54F  
3 posts
7/21/2019 1:10 pm

IM rarely works for Gold Members. RARELY.


FresnoWoman replies on 7/21/2019 8:15 pm:
That sucks. It should work, since you're paying for the site membership.

kazw24 43F
2 posts
7/21/2019 1:15 pm

there is no chat any more its advertise has free but its all charge


pagancountrygirl 61F
4303 posts
7/21/2019 1:22 pm

I'm not sure they realize...and I'm sure they don't care....just how many standard members there are on this site. Eliminating them will have a negative impact on the paying members as well.

Pagan
Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!


2Saltie2 62F  
1494 posts
7/21/2019 1:38 pm

One of the best changes ever was to take it away. Another great change would be mail controls. We could choose the age group, distance, yes or not to naked pictures and what seeking such as women men etc.

Love all animals. Tolerates humans.


FresnoWoman replies on 7/21/2019 8:16 pm:
Yeah, I don't agree with taking it away being a good thing. However, I'd be all for the ability to filter who you receive IMs and emails from. You'll still get a few liars coming through though.

redrockrascal 60M
20179 posts
7/21/2019 1:39 pm

    Quoting pagancountrygirl:
    I'm not sure they realize...and I'm sure they don't care....just how many standard members there are on this site. Eliminating them will have a negative impact on the paying members as well.
VERY good point PCG. Since the IM changed happened I've been watching my searches, women only within AZ, and it looks like both gold and standard ones are less active then they seem to have been.

With less people male/female, gold/not gold, those here will have less choices therefore less possibilities of interacting. Interacting, in various ways, is th only thing dating sites have to offer.

Far as the OP's question goes, I have only looked once at IM since the change. I did not see where I could use points to contact someone. Is that actually still possible and, if so, how?

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.


FresnoWoman replies on 7/21/2019 8:17 pm:
I don't know that from personal experience. Just that other standards have been saying it now consumes points to initiate IMs.

MyBaffies 49M
3560 posts
7/21/2019 2:21 pm

I haven't had an IM since the site changes so don't know if I lose any points or not.

However, I used to report those members who would send their email address in an IM and I'd have to click Reply so I could copy the message I was sent and paste it into the online report and then close the IM.

And because I'd clicked on Reply, I'd lose one of my three points. Even though I hadn't actually replied.

Baffies

My Blog: MyBaffies


lonlyforlove2 76M  
2269 posts
7/21/2019 2:27 pm

I think now there is a question?? Does the originator of the IM pay ? The recipient ? Or do both have to share in this expense??


Tmptrzz 56F  
62188 posts
7/21/2019 2:33 pm

I am not a standard member, and this is straight up BS and they need to give back free IM's and email. This site is going to down hill each and every day!! It's all about the all mighty dollar for them. I am always trying to help out standard members who need points..I hope your staying cool hun and enjoying a peaceful Sunday..

Just your average every day run of the mill nana here!!!


FresnoWoman replies on 7/21/2019 8:24 pm:
Thank you for that. I think the standards who are sincere, rather than bots or scammers, do add to the site, rather than detract from it. And yes, I'm staying cool in this hot weather.

OlBlueEyz46 52M
585 posts
7/21/2019 3:23 pm

you know what else is annoying...

I can read emails from guys but never from women unless it is the 1st 4 or 5 words.

Great!


s2ndegree 60M  
9177 posts
7/21/2019 3:30 pm

It used to be vital to read someone's profile and now it's more important to be able to chat to those who can't read them?

Using more than all the road!


Lounge_w9 57M
23 posts
7/21/2019 3:59 pm

there's porn on Tiwtter? omg *thud*


kk_dream_flyer76 42M
34 posts
7/21/2019 4:51 pm

    Quoting  :

Yeah then have fun at this sausage fest


kk_dream_flyer76 42M
34 posts
7/21/2019 4:53 pm

    Quoting pagancountrygirl:
    I'm not sure they realize...and I'm sure they don't care....just how many standard members there are on this site. Eliminating them will have a negative impact on the paying members as well.
And wayyyy fewer women will get free gold memberships for being “one of the most popular members on the site”


flowerkings2012 56M
4078 posts
7/21/2019 4:54 pm

Even though I was a former Gold member, I'm currently standard, which doesn't make me tight, despite the stupidity of tartwiffaheart and moronic observation- and we don't know if she's one of the many many many women who were given free gold status on the back of paying male members

Yes, we lose points now if we answer an IM, and have done for days, so not effective from 20/7/19 as the site claims. The points are lost even if person we msg or reply to is offline or ieven if msg is unread or just in sent status. I have even been deducted points for a follow up msg to same woman later on despite it in effect being part of the same 'chat'

There are plenty of similar mind to tart who only thnk Gold members are worth engagin with, though no doubt plenty of Gold members are total morons, as no doubt many of you can testify

This does have an impact on gold members being able to interact with all members on the site and devalues their membership, but, there are plenty of points like this that can be made that are way beyond the capacity of some idiots to comprehend


FresnoWoman replies on 7/21/2019 8:31 pm:
I'm beginning to think this might be a male profile versus female profile thing. I haven't lost any points for answering IMs and so far, no female standard member has voted for the first option on this poll.

I deleted Tart's response because it was overly vitriolic. If my poll had been set up to say that golds should continue subsidizing standards, then maybe the level of anger in her comment would have made sense as a response to this poll. But as a response to a poll for gathering info, it was unacceptable to me.

YoungGuyinWelly 27M
34 posts
7/21/2019 5:05 pm

they're obviously trying to make changes to the site in order to stay competitive with stuff like tinder or whatever, but this seems like it will in the long run drive people away. if there's only 5 gold members left in one city and they can't talk to anyone else why would they keep paying for it? i suspect the whole thing will fold sooner or later.

If you want to contact me send me a message on my postbox blog: My Postbox


resant78 40M/67F
2463 posts
7/21/2019 5:14 pm

I would consider paying, but the site itself doesn't appear to be a stable platform and their functions seem to work sometimes or are buggy.

It's a tough call.


AndreCachonda 51M
104 posts
7/21/2019 5:44 pm

I was at one time a gold member, until Sex Friends Finder.net tried to make an unauthorized charge on my bank card. Fortunately my bank contacted me for verification, but I then had to go to the trouble of cancelling the card and getting a new one. The thing that pissed me off was when I contacted Sex Friends Finder.net to complain about this, they completely ignored me. So they aren't getting my card number again, no matter how shitty they decide to be toward standard members.


FresnoWoman replies on 7/22/2019 10:37 am:
I don't blame you. I won't be providing them with my credit card info at any time ever for this reason.

BigDickRaymond12 38M
16 posts
7/21/2019 5:48 pm

Totally bullshit


letmesukit1 46M
21 posts
7/21/2019 6:08 pm

It sucks but since not paying i cant complain.


FresnoWoman replies on 7/21/2019 8:26 pm:
Yeah, I don't complain either. I was just wondering where and how points get deducted.

JustThatKindaGuy 48M  
9 posts
7/21/2019 8:30 pm

As a gold member, it's a joke. A lot of people sign up to see if there's anyone local and once they can't interact at all, they're going to move on. Having a limited number of free contacts per day would go a long way to encouraging people to become paying members, even going back to the old tiered membership structure with a cheaper, somewhat limited option.... Just my two cents


FresnoWoman replies on 7/21/2019 8:33 pm:
Yep. Allowing people to try before they buy, or use the site in a limited but still enjoyable way, seems like a better marketing strategy. Especially since they use number of members as a selling point. Oh well, it is their business (to run into the ground as they see fit).

BiggLala 47F  
26459 posts
7/21/2019 11:24 pm

    Quoting kk_dream_flyer76:
    And wayyyy fewer women will get free gold memberships for being “one of the most popular members on the site”
They stopped that 'privilege' over two weeks ago. No member, female or male, can receive free gold for being popular.

Need a way to message ALL members?...click here for helpful instructions in setting up a private messaging blog post.


FresnoWoman replies on 7/22/2019 10:39 am:
Yah, I've been reading about how women won't get free gold memberships any more. Wonder if that also means icebreakers won't yield temporary gold membership.

LUB2423 27M
11 posts
7/22/2019 2:44 am

Yeah you do lose them either way. I wouldn’t have a problem with the change if the messenger worked everyone but it sucks when you waste time getting points and it doesn’t work. Plus getting charged 10 points when they don’t respond is kind of bs.


jajo696 64F
637 posts
7/22/2019 3:15 am

the more i listen n read....i think the male profiles get charged either way. Th females....so far.....only get points deducted IF they initiate the IM. The IM has been tempermental for eons.....the site has done nothing.

There are others here that also feel that gold is the only way to go...and they spout off that opinion every chance they get. I, at one point, thought they worked for the site , trying to drum up more paying members. Many stories of the site making unauthorized charges on ones credit card. I would only giv them a pre paid and zero balanced after card. Especially since the gold member features/access are spotty..at best.

I have been told that the only free gold nowadays is thru making an Ice Breaker. A few people in the past week have received gold for that.

Its becoming more n more of an elitist environment....its already heavily male laden. Once they chisel the standards down to nothing, they will be recycling all gold members. An incestual cesspool in the making, IMHO~~


Defender2062 36M
25 posts
7/22/2019 6:59 am

This change is bullsh*t. I’m not paying for a membership until I see what the sites like as a standard memeber in terms of chat/interaction. But I can’t even do that now with the changes made. This site used to be good. Seems like a waste of time now...


Philharmonik3 42M
10 posts
7/22/2019 8:58 am

It‘s a shame about the lost of these 3 free IM…Sex Friends Finder.net is going to loose money again I guess…no one will pay for that !


RikDotJames001 67M
22 posts
7/22/2019 12:53 pm

Even when Standard members got 3 free per day, I never, ever had a reply to my sent IM. So I'm not missing much. Also the only emails I get is from Sex Friends Finder.net trying to get me to go Gold. I'm not surprised, since we live in a monetary society and nothing is free except the gimmicks.


Discreetmeetfish 52M
21 posts
7/22/2019 3:11 pm

seems that any points you might earn get taken one way or another.


LordMandrakeJB 63M  
349 posts
7/22/2019 3:41 pm

Before they start putting all the restrictions and rules on the IM function, why don't they FIX the damned thing first!!! I'm a gold member and cant answer IMs. And I doubt people see mine either.


Mancrotchwatcher 57M
174 posts
7/22/2019 4:07 pm

I don’t think they want to eliminate standards....yet. They use us to artificially inflate their membership numbers, thus increasing rates they can charge their advertisers.

I considered paying for the site, but after reading so many comments from former gold members saying that it’s not worth it, and others who say they aren’t renewing, we’ll......you do the math.

I’ve actually been lucky here, and I’ll hang around until it’s no longer fun, or they kick us off completely.


southernflirtfem 40F
23 posts
7/23/2019 2:58 am

it ucks


wantyoufucked 54M
31 posts
7/23/2019 4:13 am

Never been a gold member , this im charge is ridiculous. Messages charged for even though not read . Crashes during chats and have to pay more to carry on. This site is getting to be a money grabbing one


oralguy200 73M
23 posts
7/23/2019 7:58 am

New policy sucks. Also use together points for writing a story. Why is that gone?


CvilleM4U 58M
69 posts
7/23/2019 12:11 pm

Sex Friends Finder.net has wanted to limit the bandwith used by std members for a long time. They've been making little cutbacks to the service allowed for std members for years.


looking4fun12114 45M
27 posts
7/23/2019 1:13 pm

same for the men xxxx


nymphwanted2 55M
54 posts
7/23/2019 2:16 pm

obviously there goal is to get more people to pay for there service, but as for me, I think membership fee is a bit too high. especially considering that the service is subpar. the apps on this site are very fickle and in a lot of cases inoperative, I was a paying member several years ago and opted out of continuing to pay due to lack of reliability. in reality they would make more, if they lowered prices and fixed the site to work properly


TinaCd4men 57T  
6 posts
7/24/2019 12:18 am

Personally I hate receiving IM chats from standard members who cant even see who I am or what I am looking for.I come online and before I have a chance to switch my IM to busy I get IM chats coming in.In my profile I have stated that I am not here to receive IM chats.I am not sitting here waiting for them ,I like messages sent the regular way so I can answer them when I feel like it not have to answer immediately. Usually IM chatters are just masturbating and want to get off.I am not looking for that.


FresnoWoman replies on 7/24/2019 12:48 pm:
As a standard member, I can see the first sentence and part of the second sentence if I hover over your picture. You could put the "no IMs, email only" part there if you wanted. That said, I've gotten too many IMs or emails from gold male members who are married, even though they could have read my profile to learn I want single men only.

However, I think a way to filter the IMs you receive would be a much better feature. If you could set your preferences for who can view or IM you by age, location, sex, standard vs. gold, etc., I think it would really cut down on the unwanted messages that female and trans members get. Some people will lie and fill out their profiles erroneously but such a filtering feature would help.

Herewego0622 58M
6 posts
7/24/2019 4:40 am

Standard member here. It is what it is. I will never provide them with my credit card info. Not worth the risk. I can still read blogs and stories on occasion.


majichands46 57M
25 posts
7/24/2019 11:43 am

If i try to IM a female its rare they even reply back. I dont know if its me or IM dont work. Either way you lose points. Then if you try to contact them later it cost you 10 more points which sux.


FresnoWoman replies on 7/24/2019 12:49 pm:
They might be swamped with IMs already, you might not be the age they want, or some other reason. They could at least make it so you don't lose the points unless you get a response, but I doubt they will implement that.

frustratedguy48 53M
5 posts
7/24/2019 3:15 pm

I am afraid that it is the end of the world as we know it.. lol.. sucks a LOT though and not in a good way.

What with the guv'ment shutting down backpack, craigslist classified etc.. this place was one of the few left


frustratedguy48 53M
5 posts
7/24/2019 3:18 pm

    Quoting Tmptrzz:
    I am not a standard member, and this is straight up BS and they need to give back free IM's and email. This site is going to down hill each and every day!! It's all about the all mighty dollar for them. I am always trying to help out standard members who need points..I hope your staying cool hun and enjoying a peaceful Sunday..
I have NEVER had free mail.. every message, INCLUDING ones from the site, used to cost $1.95 or so if I wanted to read, which I did not. So, MOST of the mail I got went right to the discard bin.

However, that ONE person who emailed me.. I really regret not getting back with them


vagatariun 62M
50 posts
7/24/2019 4:47 pm

Well, they baited the line, now let’s see how many sign up for full membership, my experience here has been 0, most are trolls and not serious about meeting let alone chatting, unless Western union is involved


woodinworker62 57M
26 posts
7/24/2019 7:17 pm

i do not like it. This tends to be as much if not more about dating then sex


woodinworker62 57M
26 posts
7/24/2019 7:20 pm

do not like the format


brandini734 24M
108 posts
7/24/2019 11:41 pm

Yes, I've noticed that I had to pay 10 points to respond to an incoming im earlier in the morning. It sucks for the rest of the standard members since they have another restriction for this site which is only going to drive a good majority of them away rather than making extra money. In my opinion this is just going to hurt everyone else and the site itself in the long run but what do I know?


Superman4695 34M
120 posts
7/25/2019 12:45 am

    Quoting redrockrascal:
    VERY good point PCG. Since the IM changed happened I've been watching my searches, women only within AZ, and it looks like both gold and standard ones are less active then they seem to have been.

    With less people male/female, gold/not gold, those here will have less choices therefore less possibilities of interacting. Interacting, in various ways, is th only thing dating sites have to offer.

    Far as the OP's question goes, I have only looked once at IM since the change. I did not see where I could use points to contact someone. Is that actually still possible and, if so, how?
You just type your message as usual and a box comes up saying it will cost 10 points to send and you have to click on the box agreeing to it. No guarantee it will reach a valid recipient because you know how this site works.

Superman4695 I hope you are having a good day. Ladies I'll take you up, up, and away!Manscaping


Superman4695 34M
120 posts
7/25/2019 12:46 am

    Quoting lonlyforlove2:
    I think now there is a question?? Does the originator of the IM pay ? The recipient ? Or do both have to share in this expense??
Like cell phones and pretty much anywhere else both ends get charged.

Superman4695 I hope you are having a good day. Ladies I'll take you up, up, and away!Manscaping


FresnoWoman replies on 7/25/2019 10:51 pm:
I don't get charged to answer IMs. I think for now, women can still answer for free.

Acquaman2019 43M
9 posts
7/25/2019 2:30 am

It's boring without free messages


mtguy2019 64M
82 posts
7/25/2019 6:43 am

When I can Im someone it works well enough fore. But, sometimes it's a waste of time cuz never got lucky on here yet. Besides, it's not always about sex. Company? yes


Fredomm33 45M
21 posts
7/25/2019 6:47 am

It sucks !! They IM sometimes boots you off and you have to spend another ten points to get back in . This happened four times in a row to me yesterday. This site could be so much better !


Shoretosnow 27M
2 posts
7/26/2019 1:23 pm

It's a pretty crap way to do business but granted the chat function has always been the least important future for them. Considering it's broken half time gold or standard


mtbikeguy14 57M
22 posts
7/26/2019 2:06 pm

Even with the old 3 message limit you were lucky at best to even get though with a reply


icecubeheaven 39M
14 posts
7/27/2019 12:09 am

Now if they had changed the system so it allowed standard members to reply freely to gold members who initiated contact on either IM or email it would have made things a lot better, the fact you have to pay to reply as well will in my opinion reduce the use of the site..


Dover4funn 57M
23 posts
7/27/2019 4:35 pm

And now as a standard member it serms I cannot view or comment on advice lines?


southernsupguy 54M/55F
1 post
7/28/2019 6:14 am

I think it bullshit that u have to loss points when u chat


Daddydaks 45M
1 post
7/28/2019 6:20 am

* disagree


engcumman 49M
41 posts
7/28/2019 12:38 pm

I suggest using an alternative message channel. I know a number of people are using k1k and also sky1pe in the chat rooms. Certainly on the latter you can set up multiple accounts if you would rather keep your Sex Friends Finder.net life and your real life separate.


FresnoWoman replies on 7/31/2019 2:12 pm:
It's not possible to have more than one k|k account? But yes, those are options, as well as exchanging text numbers.

oraldeelite 56M
16 posts
7/28/2019 9:37 pm

I've paid b4 and it the same thing, you might get to message more but IM STILL FREEZES UP!!! not paying for that .


RustyDick72 47M
34 posts
7/28/2019 11:21 pm

I think this the 2nd time, IM stop giving free. It happened few years back, but they revert back to 3 free IM per day.

Anyway is up to them, when they are giving free IM, there tends to hv a lot of members online ( mostly fake online ) , but it give a impression that there is alot of activities going on.... but now, no free IM, it will get even worst,


FresnoWoman replies on 7/29/2019 1:50 pm:
It'd be great if they restore the former IM functionality but I won't hold my breath.

oraldeelite 56M
16 posts
7/30/2019 9:51 am

My biggest complaint is you get charged for ten points when the other party doesnt reply back to your IM message


FresnoWoman replies on 7/30/2019 12:57 pm:
I'd be annoyed to lose points that way too. At the same time, as a woman, I'm happy to benefit from a mechanism that forces men to be more selective in whom they message.

kiwiyoulike2 51M
27 posts
7/30/2019 10:02 pm

time for a new web site to be created ! by someone else


FresnoWoman replies on 7/31/2019 2:12 pm:
And you'll get right on it, won't you?

MrPub72 46M
199 posts
7/31/2019 2:13 am

This is the management decision, if the end result, doesn't see what they want to see, then they have to seriously look into it


mrpub1972 47M
27 posts
7/31/2019 8:20 pm

I believe there are reasons,the management made this decision, well , let see their next move.


nhex99 43M
41 posts
8/1/2019 12:19 pm

The IM doesn't hardly work at the best of times, but its a downward slop for the site imo not letting 3 free IM's.


jonilovebig 72M
166 posts
8/1/2019 12:26 pm

I have had 3 guys try to get with me on im it cost me 10 points each time but when I answer them they don't receive my message won't answer any more on im


yourethehost 54M

8/2/2019 9:38 pm

Could it be that Sex Friends Finder.net want's standard members to earn points by contributing to blogs, or creating artlcles instead of doing nothing and getting 3 free per day?


spicybicpl 37M/36F  
39 posts
8/3/2019 1:03 am

It's a money grab scheme by Sex Friends Finder.net.They did that so standard members would have to upgrade to gold or better


Realdeal01844 44M
12 posts
8/3/2019 3:08 pm

This website has turned to shit


Tigerfofpussycat 46M
18 posts
8/3/2019 3:10 pm

I'm ok with the new I'm system


shootitome2 68M
59 posts
8/9/2019 1:19 am

I can count on one hand the times I have been IM'ed. I personaly don't play that game. Don't chat either. If I receive a message I simply reply with an email address.
I've been responded to twice by 2 very nice gold member ladies.
Sex Friends Finder.net is a pay to play site. Hard site for a "standard." But!!! There are was to play around Sex Friends Finder.net... read the TOS.

PEEKING!!!


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