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Blogs > secret_lade > Ramblings of the depraved..... |
What the Fuck Moment #347
What the Fuck Moment #347 So.... Yah. I'm that girl who has a single brewer coffee maker for those days when she just doesn't think she can drink a whole pot. Or shouldn't.... Got a call from Wallyworld this morning. Thanks a nationwide glitch in their system, it turned out I had actually do my grocery<b> shopping </font></b>this morning instead of the planned rolling stop in the parking lot where I sign my name and they throw my food in the back of my car. Beautiful. Trying to be the normal, healthy human being I think I can be, I got up, took a shower, and my and I headed out shop. What does this have do with coffee? Tired of operating in slow mode from lack of morning coffee, I set up the single brewer make a cup while I put away the groceries. I could hear the water heating..... Smell the coffee aroma as the hot water hit the grounds.... hear the sound of coffee as it dripped from the maker into..... I was gathering up the million plastic grocery bags littered across my counter when I noticed the coffee cup sitting squarely in the middle of them. Shit... Coffee cup in hand, spinning around behind , my heart beat in my throat as I realized my coffee was brewing into nothing at all and was all over the counter, dangerously close to spilling between the counter and fridge. "Oh My Fucking God!" Now, I know you can't imaging it getting any worse than this..... I was soon to discover this was the least of my worries. I put the coffee maker in the sink and went to move the microwave to the other counter and discovered the portal to hell beneath it. Along with the coffee I found the remains of 5 of discarded nastiness. Half eaten crackers... Cheerios.... a Barbie shoe.... red juice stains?? Where in the hell did the pistachio come from? And thus, this started my day. |
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that is funny I just "hotlisted" you on that one just sayin' I've had those moments a few years back I was going to watch the world series 1989 hustled all day to get everything done, so that nothing, I mean, nothing would prevent me from watching game 1 made sure I got everything done at work, because it was on a Tuesday evening dinner was ready to go, tv turned on... then, the earthquake hit minutes before the game it was a terrible earthquake causing massive damage to California and the bay area but, like you, I was focused on trying to get everything done well, that's what your post made me think of and, this Nelly - "Here comes the boom" It's the N-E-Double L-Y I said it so I keep it realz up in my hood, on the dirty like Bledsoe Ain't got no twist in my hair, but I'm still dread throwin I gots plenty of bread so I go to bed full now Ain't in it to win, to win it I'm all in I might call you my cuz youngblood, but we ain't kin naw Ya think of jumpin man, you best think again Lil dirty, I'm the type of man that might could go for revenge Have some not so nice friends,kick the door off the hinge Take the door of ya Benz, p-p-pop 4 of your friends This here ain't cynical (Uh uh) Mental, subliminal, I'm physical, financial, and mental to be a general Lil mama come, she want a soldier Not the type be in the tank, but in that Rover I'm in the zone like AIDS full blown I'm killin it like a blind man readin, I'm feelin it like (BOOM!) Here comes the (BOOM!) Here comes the (BOOM!) Here comes the Ya'll don't really want it now (BOOM!) Here comes the (BOOM!) Here comes the (BOOM!)
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that is funny I just "hotlisted" you on that one just sayin' I've had those moments a few years back I was going to watch the world series 1989 hustled all day to get everything done, so that nothing, I mean, nothing would prevent me from watching game 1 made sure I got everything done at work, because it was on a Tuesday evening dinner was ready to go, tv turned on... then, the earthquake hit minutes before the game it was a terrible earthquake causing massive damage to California and the bay area but, like you, I was focused on trying to get everything done well, that's what your post made me think of and, this Nelly - "Here comes the boom" It's the N-E-Double L-Y I said it so I keep it realz up in my hood, on the dirty like Bledsoe Ain't got no twist in my hair, but I'm still dread throwin I gots plenty of bread so I go to bed full now Ain't in it to win, to win it I'm all in I might call you my cuz youngblood, but we ain't kin naw Ya think of jumpin man, you best think again Lil dirty, I'm the type of man that might could go for revenge Have some not so nice friends,kick the door off the hinge Take the door of ya Benz, p-p-pop 4 of your friends This here ain't cynical (Uh uh) Mental, subliminal, I'm physical, financial, and mental to be a general Lil mama come, she want a soldier Not the type be in the tank, but in that Rover I'm in the zone like AIDS full blown I'm killin it like a blind man readin, I'm feelin it like (BOOM!) Here comes the (BOOM!) Here comes the (BOOM!) Here comes the Ya'll don't really want it now (BOOM!) Here comes the (BOOM!) Here comes the (BOOM!) To leave private messages, please use my confidential mailbox at my blog: Good luck!!!
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yet another reason I have never had so much as a single cup of black juice from hell . now if I can get my new wife to stop touching and moving and hiding all my stuff I will be back to peaceful balance .
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He is my 39 yr old son. How do you move forward in life when someone is coming behind you and fucking up your established/finished possessions? He has fucked my stove, microwave, refrigerator, guest bedroom, guest and bathroom with his "don't give a shit" philosophy to life. I would gladly boot him out, if not for the grand daughters.
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yet another reason I have never had so much as a single cup of black juice from hell . now if I can get my new wife to stop touching and moving and hiding all my stuff I will be back to peaceful balance .
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1/26/2020 8:49 am |
OMG! I don't know who El Douche is, but he'd be El Homeless if he did that at my house. What a fucktard.
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I've got a 12 cup drip coffee maker but I just bought a Keurig for those days I just want a cup or 2, but not a whole pot. Just $75 and I have a cup in under a minute. I have those little wtf zones thanks to my grandkids and el douche, I don't even look for them. I just found a large burn mark on the side of my fridge where El Douche burned the microwave when he cooked noodles for 8 mins without water and totally fucked my microwave.
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that pistachio was probably still good. if u wipe the dust off, it probably still tastes - not too bad.
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Wait.....so Barbie has been limping around with only one shoe for the last five years....and you never noticed? OMG!!! Sorry to say, I was kinda laughing over this since it sounds a lot like something I would do. Well, except the Barbie shoe... Although it's only been a bit over a year since I had to move the microwave cause I was cleaning out the stick of butter that I let explode in it. That stuff was dripping everywhere
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1/26/2020 8:26 am |
I've got a 12 cup drip coffee maker but I just bought a Keurig for those days I just want a cup or 2, but not a whole pot. Just $75 and I have a cup in under a minute. I have those little wtf zones thanks to my grandkids and el douche, I don't even look for them. I just found a large burn mark on the side of my fridge where El Douche burned the microwave when he cooked noodles for 8 mins without water and totally fucked my microwave.
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that pistachio was probably still good. if u wipe the dust off, it probably still tastes - not too bad. ... is there another way to look at it Going Too Fucking Far NEW Blog Features RevealeD O O A Foolproof Method Posted Over on that NEW site O O
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Are we bragging??? Showboater.... Lol
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Wait till you look under the fridge
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Wait.....so Barbie has been limping around with only one shoe for the last five years....and you never noticed? OMG!!! Sorry to say, I was kinda laughing over this since it sounds a lot like something I would do. Well, except the Barbie shoe... Although it's only been a bit over a year since I had to move the microwave cause I was cleaning out the stick of butter that I let explode in it. That stuff was dripping everywhere
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1/26/2020 7:56 am |
Wait till you look under the fridge
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Oh, you poor soul!! LOL Hopefully your day is going way better than mine.
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