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| Blogs > SexySweet1111 > Sex and the Southern Lady |
How to pick someone up in a bar
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How to pick someone up in a bar For years, guys have asked me for advice on how to pick someone up for sex in a bar. To me it always seemed kinda obvious but I finally decided to collect my thoughts on this topic and put it in a blog so here goes. My first thought is don't go after the girl who is the hottest in the room. Find someone who is outside your usual "type." Every guy wants the busty bombshell but you face some pretty ferocious competition if you're going after her. I'm not suggesting you go for the heavy chick, but a lot of guys do. All I'm saying is try something different. Just make sure whoever you end up hitting on excites you in some way. Maybe you like her hair or butt or whatever. Guys seem to struggle to read our signals in bars and clubs and I often hear them ask how they can be sure a girl is open to hooking up. The truth is most women who go to a bar, particularly if it has a reputation as a meat market, are open to the idea of hooking up with a hot guy. You just have to convince us that you're that guy. If you approach a girl at the bar and start making conversation and notice she is lighting up to what you're saying there's a fair chance she's considering a casual hook up with you. No one goes to a bar nowdays expecting marriage and babies. If you're looking to get it that night, wait until you've established that there is some chemistry between the two of you then be straightforward with her without being crude. This way you are not pretending to want something other than a hookup and no one's feelings will be hurt. Women really respect this part. Lines that guys used successfully on me included anything from "what are you doing tonight" or an unmistakeable "want to go back to my place for sex?" Whatever your phrasing, just be clear about what you are looking for. Be prepared for any kind of response if you are being honest with her. She may turn you down and that's ok but if she's interested she doesn't need an hour of conversation. Men complain that women aren't as sexually aggressive and ask why we don't make it better known when we want sex. The truth is most women view hookups as a guilty pleasure and when we're doing the walk of shame we often feel like sluts. In some way by not being aggressive about seeking a sex partner we feel as if we aren't as slutty as one of those other girls we might mock or make fun of. If you are getting ready to hookup with a complete stranger, safety ALWAYS comes first. For women especially we have so many fears about<b> sleeping </font></b>with a guy we just met no matter how hot he is. Don't push her to do something she's reluctant to do. Try to accomodate her fears and make her more comfortable. Usually women let a close girlfriend know what they are planning so someone will know where she's disappeared off to. Many women stop drinking once they know they are about to hookup so don't keep buying her drinks. Be cool if she wants to bring you back to her place even if its all the way across town and your place is closer. for her having sex in a familiar place is a comfort. Most women may be having doubts at this point no matter how eager she seems to be to have sex so giver her a chance to change her mind or even warm up to the idea. There may be issues going on you have no idea about. She may be dating someone or even married and is struggling with the idea of crossing the line and actually having sex. Sex for women is much more complicated than it is for men. We have to make sure we are truly comfortable with the idea of a one-time hookup and are comfortable with the idea long after the guy has gone off. If we're going to value our body less after letting a stranger enjoy it, we can be opening ourselves up to a lot of serious issues down the line. I hope you find this helpful. I have additional thoughts on this and will likely continue this as a blog topic. I'd also love to hear your comments. |
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I appreciate the valuable insight. One piece of advice I received long ago, A woman once told me, what she wants is often displayed in her eyes and then her smile. She also said to take rejection with maturity, the woman may just mean she cannot at the moment but finds you interesting and could another time.
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Personally I prefer to be chased rather than do the chasing. I've found a nice smile goes a long way. It sends the message that you are interested without the use of some cheesy pick up line. It's amazing how much communication goes on simply with one's eyes. I've found women very perceptive to the right eye contact. Fortunately for me I'm not much of a drinker as I've also found that falling down drunk is never very attractive. ✌
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