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Something about help 👅👄ðŸ˜ŧðŸ˜ē  

pal334 69M  
49507 posts
2/11/2019 5:23 am

Last Read:
2/12/2019 3:56 pm

Something about help 👅👄ðŸ˜ŧðŸ˜ē


While chatting over a beer with my friends, we remembered some critical tips , for getting along in society . One of the guys referred me to the book of manners that I attached below. After e discussed them, we did realize how helpful they have been . Are they helpful to you? Can you think of other tips to include?

Tips From the Redneck Book of Manners

1. Never take a beer to a job interview.

2.Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them.

3.It's considered poor taste to take a cooler to church.

4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets.

5. Even if you're certain that you are included in the will, it is still considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral home.


Dining Out

1. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label.

2. Avoid throwing bones and food scraps on the floor as the restaurant may not have dogs.


ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME

1. A center piece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist.

2. Do not allow the to eat at the table no matter how good his manners are.


PERSONAL HYGIENE

1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck keys

2. Proper use of toiletries can forestall bathing for several days. However, if you live alone, deodorant is a waste of good money.

3. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a social no-no, as they tend to detract from a woman's jewellery and alter the taste of finger foods.



DATING (OUTSIDE THE FAMILY)


1. Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date.

2. Be aggressive. Let her know you're interested: 'I've been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the bathroom wall two years ago.'

3. Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say 10:00 PM; others might say 'Monday.' If the latter is the answer, it is the man's responsibility to get her to school on time.

4. Always have a positive comment about your date's appearance, such as, 'Ya'll sure don't sweat much for a fat gal.'


WEDDINGS

1. Livestock, usually, is a poor choice for a wedding gift.

2. Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds may get you shot.

3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean bowling shirt can create too sporty an appearance.

4. Though uncomfortable, say 'yes' to socks and shoes for this special occasion.

5. It is not appropriate to tell the groom how good his wife is in the sack.


DRIVING ETIQUETTE

1. When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of way.

2. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.

3. When sending your wife/girlfriend down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer.

4. Never relieve yourself from a moving vehicle, especially when driving.

5. Do not lay (burn) rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.


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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
2/11/2019 5:25 am

One guy mentioned a way of asking other advice [image]

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SimpleLatina 59F
3447 posts
2/11/2019 6:32 am

The dining out tips are so important, who would want the food just laying on the floor?


sweet_VM 65F
81699 posts
2/11/2019 9:07 am

Love this post on this very snowy day here. Hugs V

Become a blog watcher sweet_vm


Tmptrzz 61F  
107039 posts
2/11/2019 10:24 am

Happy Monday Pal, thanks so much for the laughs today, the Redneck one was hilarious.. I hope you have a great week..

Seduce the mind and see what a wonderful adventure the body will take you on..


scott6250 61M

2/11/2019 11:00 am

LOL that is hilarious. Happy Monday.

"Sweet, steamy, sensuous kisses light the bright fires of passionate lust within us." scott6250


ltrskr 75M

2/11/2019 11:10 am

"Never argue with a fool, bystanders won't know the difference!"


pal334 69M  
45821 posts
2/12/2019 3:53 pm

    Quoting SimpleLatina:
    The dining out tips are so important, who would want the food just laying on the floor?
Isn't that so true ?

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
2/12/2019 3:54 pm

    Quoting sweet_VM:
    Love this post on this very snowy day here. Hugs V
A good chuckle will brighten the day

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
2/12/2019 3:54 pm

    Quoting Tmptrzz:
    Happy Monday Pal, thanks so much for the laughs today, the Redneck one was hilarious.. I hope you have a great week..
The lifestyle can be hilarious

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
2/12/2019 3:55 pm

    Quoting scott6250:
    LOL that is hilarious. Happy Monday.
Trying to keep folks happy

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pal334 69M  
45821 posts
2/12/2019 3:56 pm

    Quoting ltrskr:
    "Never argue with a fool, bystanders won't know the difference!"
So very true

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